Monday, May 3, 2010

PGH Sports Talk- The Best/Worst/Funniest of Pittsburgh Sports

"So you're an expert?"
- Ottawa Senators Defenseman Andy Sutton

Yes, Andy. I'm an expert.

Okay, so maybe I'm not an expert, but in the age of the Internet, we sure can fake it. The goal of this blog is simply to discuss Pittsburgh Sports. No more, no less. I plan to keep it as up to date as possible, while making far-reaching and seldom successful attempts at humor.

Let the fun begin:

1. Pittsburgh Penguins

Three weeks ago, Montreal Canadiens goalie Jaroslav Halak was about as well-known in Pittsburgh as a winning baseball team. Since his nearly single-handed upset of the Capitals and his stellar performance in Game 2, he is apparently the new Patrick Roy. Or at least according to sportswriters. From here on out, anytime Halak wins a game, he continues to further cement his status as the greatest goalie of all time.

Pause 10 seconds for me to properly grovel at his feet.

Let us be realistic for a moment. Simply because a goalie steps up his game and beats a team that on paper he shouldn't, doesn't mean that he is the end-all, be-all of his position. The Penguins have the firepower and more importantly the patience and coaching to overcome whatever crap Montreal can pull.

In a somewhat unrelated note, Washington Capitals coach (for now) Bruce Boudreau plans to spend his summer on his new book, Epic Fail: The Bruce Boudreau Story. Word is that he plans to release the book after his firing, and will be available at all Washington DC area Kentucky Fried Chickens if fans would like a signed copy.

2. Pittsburgh Steelers

Ben Roethlisberger Alleged Sexual Assault Tally: 4 (not including locker room shenanigans)

Limas Sweed potentially suffered a serious ACL injury. Fans will sorely miss his 3 catch, 30 drop seasons.

Until June/Pens lose, Pittsburgh fans won't really care about anything that happens at the UPMC Sports Complex in the South Side: unless Ben attempts to rape a teammate.

3. Pittsburgh Pirates

The Pirates have been outscored this season 175-86.

That's it. There's no punchline.

Further updating as events warrant. Booooooom.

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