Captain Obvious? Part 2- Southeast Division

This is too much fun. I love standing up on this pulpit, judging other people's/teams decisions. I would be a sweet cult leader, but none of that mass suicide crap, unless we lose another Stanley Cup or Super Bowl. Anyways, on with the show, this installment focuses on the captains of the Southeast Division.


Washington Capitals:



Captain: Alexander Ovechkin
Player who should be Captain: Brooks Laich

I know he's a free agent this year, but my man-crush on Brooks Laich knows no contractual stipulations. But man, when you have a team as loaded as the Caps are, and as their leader, you can't inspire them to even win a game in the second round of the playoffs, or for that matter, to EVER get past the second round? That's pretty bad. I'm not taking anything away from Ovechkin as a player, he's got more talent than I could ever hope to have in anything. But the facts remain the same. Unlike Crosby, he's shown no real ability to lead his troops. He doesn't raise the game of the people around him, he simply tries to win the game by himself. This was never more apparent than in Game 4 of the Lightning series this year. Ovi probably took about a billion shots in that game, but nobody around him was playing with any sense of urgency. As a captain, you need to harness your energy and distribute it amongst the rest of your team. Ovechkin doesn't seem to have that ability, and until he does (if ever), he doesn't deserve the "C".



Tampa Bay Lightning



Captain: Vincent LeCavalier
Player who should be Captain: Martin St. Louis

This is probably more for the sake of argument than anything else. LeCavalier seems like a perfectly capable Captain. He leads, he raises his game up to the next level when he needs to, and plays a pretty clean game. It's hard not to love Martin St. Louis though. He's the ultimate underdog. Undrafted out of the University of Vermont, and extremely undersized, his tenacity and utter refusal to let his stature be a hindrance to his game is an inspiration to all who watch him. This is a truly tough call.



Carolina Hurricanes



Captain: Eric Staal
Player who should be Captain: Eric Staal

There's not really anyone else it could be. Cam Ward? Meh.



Atlanta Thrashers/Manitoba Moose?



Captain: Andrew Ladd
Player who should be Captain: Andrew Ladd

A case could be made for Dustin Byfuglien, but he's only been there a year. For the few Thrashers games that Pens fans get to watch in a year, eyes often fixate to Ladd. A very underrated player, Ladd looks as if he's always trying to hold back an avalanche. He knows the team around him sucks, but every shift, he strives for that not to be the case. Andrew, if you don't feel like moving your stuff the whole way to Manitoba, feel free to just set up camp here in Pittsburgh. I can hope, right?


Florida Panthers:



Captain: None
Player who should be Captain: None

If you can even name three players on the Panthers, congratulations. So why should they even have a Captain? Management is making the right call here. Nobody cares about your team anyways, why put in the work of deciding on who should be Captain? Just go lay on the beach.

On second thought, they should probably make Scott Clemmensen the captain just because of this:



Refreshing.

"Real Caps Fans Should Hope to get Swept"

I can't even explain how much I love the Washington Capitals message board. There's no better tonic to help you forget about the pain of the Pens losing in the first round of the playoffs. So as I'm going through my time-tested ritual of perusing the Caps boards after another painful playoff loss, I come across this gem of a headline:



"Real Caps Fans Should Hope to get Swept"

My first thought was, "OK, they just lost, people are talking irrationally, and this is probably just some drunk who everyone will rail against." Aha, I overestimated Caps fans once again. Here are some of the responses:

"100% AGREE! I am going to be angry if I have to watch this sorry team play anymore after tomorrow night. I think the players don't like (or at least have absolutely no respect) for BB so we may see, and I hope we do, a collective F-U Bruce collapse tomorrow night."

"Well we definitely need a new coach. Getting swept might do that for us. I actually like watching TB play, so they'll be fun to cheer for next round."

"I think when Tampa Bay scores first,they'll roll over. "

"I agree wholeheartedly"


Those are pretty much Caps fans in a nutshell. They even have an "Official Fire Bruce Boudreau Petition" that has 90 replies. Sometimes I can't even believe there are any Caps fans left, because most of them appear to want to lie down in the middle of the Beltway during rush hour. Truly, that's how the players looked after last night's game as well. Every game that Tampa Bay wins further validates the Penguins season. At least we put up a fight. When the Caps had to make a play, they folded in a major way.

Even after the game, things got even better, with Bruce Boudreau throwing players and refs under the bus so quickly that you'd think that they were keeping him from getting to a Dunkin Donuts.

Bruce Boudreau being a a fat whiny douche.

Unbelievable stuff. Especially that he calls out Eric Fehr by name. I've watched this series, and Fehr has been one of the most impressive Caps. He gives it his all on every shift, a fact that Pens fans learned during the Winter Classic. Boudreau even has the gall to call out the refs for his Too Many Men penalty while they were on the power play in the first, negating a Caps goal.

NEWS FLASH: If you have six guys on the ice, YOU HAVE TOO MANY MEN.

After this, Boudreau casts even more blame on the refs, saying that Malone's game-winning goal shouldn't have counted because Malone's stick hits Neuvirth's pad.



If you stop the video at 0:50, you can see that D-Man John Carlson's skate is colliding with Neuvirth's pad at a far greater velocity that Ryan Malone's stick. In fact, before the puck even goes in the net, Malone's stick is completely off Neuvirth, as Carlson's skate continues to push him away from the puck. Boudreau is a ridiculous joke of a coach.

Can't wait to see how the "Real Caps Fans" show up in Game 4.

The Two Sides of the 2011 Winter Classic

In case you fell asleep at 6:30 last night and are just now waking up, the 2011 Winter Classic will be between the Pens and the Capitals at Heinz Field. This had been being discussed for some time now, and the decision shouldn’t really come as a surprise. As can be expected, not everyone is going to be happy about this decision, and rightfully so. In order to look at what the Pens v. Caps WC truly means, I will attempt to separate myself into a Penguin fan and a general hockey fan.

Pens Fan Kurt:



The NHL is the smartest league ever. 57,000+ screaming Pens fans? A once in a lifetime experience. I will do terrible, despicable things to get tickets to this game. The thought of watching Crosby v. Ovechkin in a driving snowstorm is so exciting that I may have to change my pants. This is going to be an instant classic, without a doubt the best and most competitive Winter Classic by far. The ratings and attendance will be through the roof. As a hockey fan, how can you not totally be in love with this idea?

To rebut, Hockey fan Kurt:



If I have to see one more nationally televised Pens-Caps game, I will hurl myself off the nearest building. I already have to deal with 3 of the 6 nationally televised games in February/March be the Pens-Caps, why do I have to watch one in January? How can this be the fourth Winter Classic and we’ve yet to see a Canadian team? Hockey fans would watch a Toronto-Montreal WC just the same. It’s unfortunate that the ratings have to define the teams that can play in the Winter Classic. The NHL is just beating the Crosby/Ovechkin rivalry to death.

Truth be told, this is basically how I feel about the 2011 Winter Classic. Of course I want to go, or at least watch it. I think it’s great for the city of Pittsburgh. But I can also see that from the perspective of a hockey fan, it’s tiring to ALWAYS see the Pens v. Capitals. It’s not fair to the other hockey teams, fans and cities that deserve the opportunity to host the Winter Classic. It’s not fair that the Pens have played in two of the four.

All arguments aside though, who can forget this?



Pens for the win.