Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Captain Obvious? Part 3- Northeast Division

The Northeast Division sucks. I can always count on them for awful, boring hockey. I forgot Ottawa even had a team. Oh well, here goes:

Boston Bruins:

Captain: Zdeno Chara
Player who should be Captain: Zdeno Chara

I may hate Chara, but he's about the only choice. Recchi? Meh, no thanks. I think Chara is overrated, big and clumsy. He's got a great shot and is a good puck mover, but beyond that, I don't see anything particularly masterful about his game. He may not be a "repeat offender", but Chara has a history of some unpunished nasty play (see: the Max Pacioretty incident). Hopefully he doesn't get his ring this year.

Montreal Canadiens:

Captain: Brian Gionta
Player who should be Captain: Brian Gionta

Brian Gionta is an easy choice. He's what a Captain should be: a pain in the ass. Every team that plays against him knows it. He always manages to score the big goal, and is a true warrior. Like Marty St. Louis, Gionta uses his small stature to his advantage, creating leverage that lets him deliver some big hits. He's a consistent 20-plus goal guy (the year after the lockout, he had almost 50 goals, don't know where the hell that came from). I would have to believe there are a lot of teams in the NHL who would love Gionta as a captain.

Buffalo Sabres:

Captain: Nobody.
Player who should be Captain: Jason Pominville

This is tough. I dislike Buffalo, but they're a team full of captain-esque players. Pominville, to me, stands out. After Ryan Miller, Pominville is the first Sabre I think about (sorry, Thomas Vanek). He's another gritty guy who isn't afraid to trade some paint (thought I'd throw in a NASCAR term for the 2 people who read my blog wondering why I never talk about racing). Here's my process: When I think about who should be the Captain of a team, I think about what person I would want the Pens to have, and in this case, it's Jason Pominville.

Ottawa Senators:

Captain: Daniel Alfredsson
Player who should be Captain: Nobody.

They don't deserve a captain. Here's their current one:

I'm not begrudging Alfredsson's talent, he's a great player. But in the same realm as French soccer legend Zinedine Zidane, when I think about Alfredsson, I don't think about his ability, I think of this play. Mind the situation, a 2-2 tie in Game 4 of the Stanley Cup Finals. I don't care what he says, this is intentional. If you watch the video, you'll bear witness to the only time I've ever agreed with Pierre McGuire. He eyes up Niedermayer, ADJUSTS HIS BODY, and fires the puck. It was captain-vs.-captain, and it showed me everything I know about who was the superior player and person in that situation. What a jerk.

Toronto Maple Leafs:

Captain: Dion Phaneuf
Player who should be Captain: Nobody, every Maple Leafs fan should wear a "C"

Seriously, being a Maple Leaf fan for the last 20 years sucks. The fact that they sell out every game is a testament to the fans in Toronto.

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